Work vs Family

Last week, an officemate of mine asked me which is more important for me-- my work or my family.  I confidently answered, "my family".  Well, I work for my family, right?  Actually, I was kinda irritated by his question because it sounded sarcastic...or was it just I was being too sensitive because I didn't want to be confronted like that-- choosing between two important aspects of my life, especially by someone who also has a family himself!

The question was actually just a joke, probably a harmless comment said to me because I excused myself from having an overtime that day because it was by husband's birthday (well, the overtime wasn't paid too!).  But I wasn't amused by that joke.  I felt like I was being pressured to decide according to his view in life.  It wasn't the first time he commented on my decisions regarding my family life, and I found his unsolicited comments and advices quite annoying.

I knew some instances wherein the woman chose her career over her family.  The reason for their decision was that they feel empowered and confident when they become successful at work-- which is true, of course and I'm not against it.  But being too much work-focused can also have consequences.  And for my colleagues who chose work over their families (especially their husbands), they ended up having a broken relationship with them (and changing their Facebook status from "married" to "single").

And I also knew some instances wherein the woman gave up her career in order to be with her family and to become a full-pledged homemaker whose life is dedicated to serve her husband and children.  I often wonder how their family are makes ends meet with only the husband who earns money.  But nevertheless, they still survive.

I never wanted to become a workaholic career woman, nor a full-pledged homemaker.  I like to work...but only for the right reason.  I work for my family, not for the love of work itself (though we also have to love our work in order to be happy...but maybe not too much that we neglect to give time and happiness to our family members).  As we work hard to earn money, we should also work HARDER to have and maintain good relationship with our family...and we can achieve this through prioritization and time management.

La lang, nag-vent out lang ako. Peace. :)

Being a New Mom, Having a New Lifestyle

**I began to write this post a week when I was still a full time homemaker, before I got hired from my new job.  But I finished this a week after I started my new work.  Therefore, to avoid confusion, I maintain the persona of a housewife as I continue and finish this entry.**

My baby now turned 8 months, and this stage is really different from her early months.  When she was 1-3 months old, she barely keeps awake and therefore I could do other household chores that needs to be done.  When she was 4-6 months old, our sleeping nights were quiet (unlike when she was 1-3 months old wherein she would always wake up at night because she was hungry).  She had learned to sleep throughout the night.  But when she turned 7 months old, she started to wake up again in the night, not because she's hungry, but because she wanted company.  She also now has longer time being awake...which means she always look forward to play with me...and because of it, I couldn't do other chores (and even finish this blog!).  Being a mom really is a new lifestyle for me!

My new lifestyle of being a full-time mom of an 8 month old baby girl (with no helpers around):

1.  Having only a 5 minute brunch meal break.  But if I want it longer, I eat my meal while my baby is sleeping at 11:00 am, which would take an hour, if I'm lucky.

2.  But having my meal breaks while she's sleeping would mean moving my bath time at her afternoon nap, which is around 4:00pm.  This nap time of hers usually takes only 30 minutes.  So I would just splash my whole body with the liquid bath soap, put some shampoo on my hair, and rinse myself as fast as I can.  Scrubbing is reserved for weekends, wherein my husband could babysit for our baby longer while I do my things.  Sometimes if I'm unlucky (means my baby would just sleep for a few minutes), I would have my bath time at night before I go to sleep.

3.  Watching cartoons for most of the time.  I already know the schedules of Nickolodeon shows at TV5.  The first show we watch in the morning is Hi5 (that's at 7am in the morning), then followed by Dora the Explorer / Go Diego Go!, Blue's Clues / Wonder Pets, Spongebob, Danny Phantom and Jimmy Neutron. My baby can't get enough of those shows!  Everytime she hears the theme songs (especially the opening songs of the show), her eyes would be glued at the tv.  My baby loves Spongebob Squarepants so much, she glows with joy whenever she hears him talk or sing.  And because of that, I learned a lot about Spongebob...I actually got perfect scores in Spongebob quizzes applications in Facebook!

4. Speaking of theme songs, since my baby and I watch those shows everyday, I can't help but to memorize the music they play.  Sometimes I develop the Last Song Syndrome wherein I tend to unconsciously sing the last song I hear---which are the theme songs of the cartoon shows we watch. ~If only I cauld join you there in the air...floating free without a care.  I wish I could fly and see things with a different eye...~  Guess in what cartoon program you heard that one! :)

5.  Bending exercises.  My baby would snatch a toy and then throw it on the floor.  She would do the same for the next toy she would get.  And the next.  So therefore, I had no choice but to pick up every little bit of her tos on the floor every now and then.

6.  Aside from toys, she now also tries to grab other things such as car keys, cellphones, figurines, and electric fans!  Therefore we have to baby proof the rooms.  All delicate and fragile things are now hidden from her.  So imagine our house becoming more bare than before...except for the stuff toys lying around.

7. Sleepless nights again.  As an 8 month old baby, she develops separation anxiety.  Whenever she sleeps, she thought she was left alone.  And when that happens, I get up and cradle her to sleep again.

8.  Being my baby's personal dietitian.  Since she's now eating solid foods, I make sure to provide her the right nutrients (and the right food for her age).  She is now eating lugaw (plain porridge or rice congee), mashed vegetables such as carrot, potato, squash, and sayote (chayote), mashed fruits like banana and mango, and she also munch on the famous biscuit for baby here in the Philippines (Marie biscuit) and the famous baby food Cerelac (all diffrent flavors). But I make sure she still take lots of milk and water.

9.  Being my baby's number 1 playmate.  Well, it's just the two of us in the house for the whole day.  That's why she's always looking forward to play with me.  And I really have to be creative so that our play time would also be a learning experience for her.

10.  My baby's hugs becomes tighter and warmer.  She's now consciously smiles to people who really please her.  Her eyes already clearly show joy, fear, anger, and other moods.  She already knows how to grunt, chuckle, and other sounds she can pronounce ("Mamama" when she wants to be comforted or when she's hungry, "Papapa" when she wants to play, "Abababa" when she becomes impatient). Whenever I witness her every milestone and development, I can't help but to feel proud.  Despite of being tired, sleepy, hungry, and even stinky most of the time, I still love to do mothering duties to my daughter...because whenever I see her happy, then I become happy, too.  It's my new lifestyle--- a proud and happy mama! :)